Who Will Our Customer Become?

Beyond the Crisis: Who Are We Helping Them Become

I want to share a simple framework that has helped me understand the long arc of a transformation. It’s a progression I’ve seen firsthand, and it mirrors the journey many of the people and communities we serve are navigating.

The phases – Relief, Rehab, and Development—are described in When Helping Hurts by Steve Corbett & Brian Fikkert.

My mom’s struggle through alcoholism illustrates these three phases. Together, they create the conditions for real transformation.

1.       Relief—stop the bleeding

Relief is urgent, temporary, and rare.

When I was in seventh grade, I found Mom passed out on the kitchen floor at 2 am. It was one moment in a long cycle of drinking, sobriety, and relapse. Relief is the moment the drinking stops—the emergency stabilization of detox. It’s temporary. It’s necessary. But it’s not yet transformative. Mom struggled through detox multiple times.

2.        Rehab—Restores stability

Rehab begins once the crisis is halted. It restores the person to where they were before the crisis.

Each time Mom completed detox, she entered rehab: in-patient counseling, group support and the slow rebuilding of routines. Rehab helps a person—or community—gain stability, return to who they were before the crisis, but it does not immediately lead to further growth.

In Mom’s case, multiple relapses revealed how fragile this phase can be.

3.       Development—Grow into someone stronger than before 

Development is the process of ongoing change that moves everyone forward, the helpers and the helped.

In 1985, after Mom’s drinking partner died, she hit bottom. During her final rehab, the doctor told her this was her last chance. She quit drinking again. But this time, she didn’t just return to her old self, she grew into someone wiser, steadier, and deeply outward‑focused.

Her development included attending weekly AA meetings where she shared her testimony and offered tough love to friends battling the bottle. Mom visited elderly shut‑ins with her dog, Dudley, listening to their stories. She volunteered at the hospital, served through her church, and became a docent at Franklin Park Conservatory. Every year she opened her home on the 4^th of July welcoming a large gathering of family, friends and neighbors.

When I asked about her most meaningful outreach, Mom said visiting shut‑ins mattered most. Those visits brightened their lonely days.

During the period of mom’s struggle, my parents' relationship was strained, yet Dad remained a steady source of support for our family. He endured her misguided verbal attacks but rarely, responded in kind—at least not in front of my brother, sister, and me. A decade after Mom’s recovery, Dad’s health began to fail and the roles reversed. Mom took on the responsibility as Dad’s caregiver.

Mom spent four sober decades nourishing others. That’s the fruit-bearing stage—the Development phase—where purpose takes root and becomes a gift to the community.

Last year, she died having lived a life that transformed not only herself but many around her.

Why this matters for your work

The people and communities we serve often move through these same phases:

• Relief stops the crisis.

• Rehab restores stability.

• Development transforms everyone involved.

Or our work is stuck on relief.

Who will your customer become?

Transformation isn’t just about solving a crisis. It’s about creating the conditions people can grow into who they’re capable of becoming. Where their growth helps nourish others.

Meaningful change takes a collective effort, shaped by connection, whether individual, community, or global. It requires the collective efforts of people and organizations.

When your work changes someone’s life, what happens next?

Transformation becomes powerful when it doesn’t end with one person, but it begins there.

Wes Legg

Strategic Plan Facilitator & Coach